Winters Thaw
by ArielJune
Summary: Set after Captain America: Winter Soldier, follows the Winter Soldier as he attempts to regain his memory and hopefully a semblance of a real life. Sadie enters the picture right when he can't seem to take one more step. Why does he think she knows him, and how did he know to find her? Currently set at T, but may move up to M as the story progresses.
1. Chapter 1

Set after Captain America: Winter Soldier, follows the Winter Soldier as he attempts to regain his memory and hopefully a semblance of a real life. Sadie Tanner, enters the picture right when he can't seem to take one more step. Why does he think she knows him, and how did he know to find her?

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Chapter 1

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Sadie couldn't identify what woke her first, but what kept her up was Ace's incessant barking somewhere outside. A weight seemed to settle in her stomach, as after hearing the pitter-patter of the rain on the tin roof the horses then started in on the chaos. She ran down the stairs, hastily pulling on her long rain boots at the door and burst out in to the rain. Running down the walkway to the barn, she could just see Ace's curled tail bouncing back and forth in front of the door over the small hill she had left to cover.

"Shhhh…" she tried to tell the frantic mutt as she reached the door. Reaching for the handle she yanked it open, expecting the worse. In her mind she worried that the horses had all gotten sick and were dying or that a wild animal had gotten in. Pulling back the door she quickly flicked on the lights to see all the horses contained and accounted for but definitely agitated, pacing back and forth in their stalls. Sadie wiped the rain off of her face as she went from stall to stall calming them.

"There, there Violet. It's just the storm, nothing's wrong." She cooed to her favorite, while stroking her white nose. Looking in to Violets widened eyes, Sadie saw the horse glance to the empty stall at the end and her ears perk up and around searching for noises. Sadie turned around and saw that Ace was there at the stall door, growling softly.

"Hello?" Sadie asked, feeling stupid for asking such a silly question. If it was a murderer he wouldn't very likely answer her back. Steeling her courage, and knowing Ace and the other horses were around she looked quickly through the grill of the stall. There was nothing there, except she couldn't quite see where the stall doors shadow fell. Ace's growls continued, and grew in volume.

"Okay Ace, get ready." She warned the dog. She took a deep breath while thinking, "God, why didn't I bring the gun, Idiot."

She found a horse shoe close by, and holding it aloft she threw the door open. A pair of dark brown eyes stared up at her from underneath a layer of grime, hay, and blood. Ace lunged, but then a hand shot up from the mass.

"NO!" Sadie screamed, thinking this man was going to try to hurt her dog, just to see him hold it up in surrender to Ace and her. Ace sniffed along the hand up the arm and finally licked just once on the face before turning back to Sadie with a smile, as if to say, "look who I found, aren't you proud?" The man turned his eyes back to her, and she couldn't look in to them without feeling his sadness pour off of him. She had never seen such a confused and overwhelmed expression on any man, the hand holding the iron horseshoe fell.

"Do you," He spoke, croaking the first few words before trying again after a series of coughs and deep breaths, "do you know me?"

With his question asked, all the strength he had left in his body seemed to leave him and he fell back on to the floor. Ace quickly attempted to revive the man with kisses and nudges of his wet nose, while Sadie took a second to collect herself. When she had opened the stall she had expected an animal; a possum or at worse a raccoon. Not a man, and not a banged up, nasty one to boot.

"Oh my God," she whispered before getting her bearings back. "We've got to get him inside."

Sadie would later look back and wonder how in the world she was able to get his body up and in to the main house. He had to weigh at least three times as much as her, and being passed out didn't help either. Maybe it was the adrenaline flowing through her veins from the whole experience, or maybe she had latent super powers, but somehow she made it through the back door with him in tow. The door led from the mud room to the kitchen, which once inside she laid his body down on the breakfast table. She quickly looked him over; his once black sweats were battered and torn in multiple places. Sadie wondered if maybe he was a burglar, since based on his outfit he obviously didn't want to be seen. He was also wearing thick gloves, even though it was still late summer, not nearly cold enough. She hesitated, and then leaned down moving his matted hair out of the way to place her palm on his forehead.

"God, he's burning up," she mumbled to herself, then started removing his outerwear. She started with his boots and socks revealing the first semi-clean bit of him. She then reached up to take off his gloves, starting with the right one. It was obvious that he used his hands a lot; his hand was calloused and had a few faded scars that would probably never completely go away. His hand reminded her of her Grandfathers, worn from hard work. Reaching for the other glove, his right hand shot up grabbing her jaw making her scream before he forced her head up to look in his eyes. His face had completely transformed from the sad, confused man she had seen to one of a man possessed. He looked ready to kill.

"Your okay, your okay. I'm trying to help you." She spoke through her clenched jaw, soothingly as she would to one of her animals. "My name is Sadie, I won't hurt you so let me go."

His grip did not lessen, instead he brought her head closer to his, staring deeply in to her eyes. What he was searching for she didn't know, but she did not back down or avert her gaze. His grip was tight but not enough to hurt, just enough to keep her immobile. She felt every bit of his rough hands as the held her captive, causing a shiver to run down her back. Her anger rose as he kept her in place. Here she was trying to help him and all he could do was be aggressive. With narrowed eyes she spoke slowly but firmly, "Let me go now." His head tilted to the side, before he slowly released her jaw.

"Thank you." She lifted herself back up, dusted her hands on her pajama pants then told him in a clinical manner," You have a high degree fever. I need to get you out of these soaked clothes, and I have to tend to your wounds. Since you are not well enough to do it yourself, I will be helping you. So, if you would be so kind as to let me remove your clothes."

She heard a gruff reply in the affirmative before reaching once again for his left hands glove. She slipped it off while glancing at his face, he grimaced and thinking she had hurt his hand she quickly looked down.

Sadie released a soft, "Oh!" His hand was completely metal, she initially thought it was a prosthetic, but it certainly didn't move like a prosthetic. Her eyes darted back to his face, her mouth half open wanting to ask what had happened to him. But the man had turned his head away, looking through the kitchen window and out into the distance. Once again she could see the tortured soul inside him and deciding that the best course of action was to march on, instead of asking questions. She started pulling his sweat shirt off of him.

"Let me know if I hurt you," she whispered. With the shirt off she could see that it was much more than just a prosthetic hand, his entire arm up to the shoulder joint was in the same type of metal, with a single red star on the outside of what would have been his bicep. She quickly looked away in an attempt to make him feel more comfortable. She instead focused on his chest where he had severe bruising and what looked to be a broken rib. Her hands softly touched the purpled and yellowed skin, hearing him suck in a breath of air and holding it the moment she touched his ribs.

"You've broken a rib maybe two, tough to say without an x-ray." It helped her to continue speaking in her clinical voice. She wasn't used to seeing human injuries, in a way it was harder to keep her emotions separated.

"Let me grab some dry clothes real quick, don't go anywhere." She laughed sardonically in her head, as if he could. She ran upstairs to the door to her Grandfathers room. She stopped short just before bursting through, this was the first time she had been in there since the funeral. But no matter how painful it was for her, she knew this was the only chance of finding something that would remotely fit the man. Everything was exactly as he had left it, and luckily she knew exactly where he kept everything. She grabbed a button down flannel pajama shirt, a pair of boxers, and matching flannel pajama pants. As she was leaving she noticed the room still even managed to smell like him, and with a smile she ran back down the stairs and in to the kitchen. The man was right where she left him, with the only difference being his real arm was now hanging down and stroking Ace on the head.

"Okay! So let's get you dried off and warm, then we can work on your head. I'll have to give you a few stitches on that cut over your eyebrow." She started rambling as she worked on his pants, for the first time starting to get nervous about seeing him naked."Don't worry, I'll make sure it's clean and I'm really great at stitches." She then added as an afterthought, "Although you'll be my first human."

At this point his sweat pants had been added to the pile of clothes. He was left in a pair of black boxer-briefs, and she wondered if he wore any other color. Looking at him now, she was able to notice just how fit he was. His body seemed like it had been worked on for ages to achieve the perfection she saw. His legs weren't nearly as beat up as his torso and chest, just some light bruising around the knee. Her gaze drew ever upwards, to where she rested her eyes on his hips and just below.

"Ahem." She cleared her throat before looking up in his face and away from all the distracting stuff. His eyes were once again trained on her face, looking for something.

"If you could lift please," He did so with a raise of an eyebrow and she quickly shed his boxer-briefs without looking and placed his legs in to the boxers she had brought down. Through her periphery she could barely make out his thin hips, and the generous member between them. Her face flushed as she struggled not to actually look. He lifted his hips again without being told, and she thanked her lucky stars she didn't fumble that up and accidently touch him. With the worst out of the way she continued with her ramble.

"Oh, so as I was saying. You will be the first human I have ever given stitches to. I'm a licensed vet tech. so I've only ever stitched up animals. You know dogs, cats, a few squirrels, oooh and a tiger once." By this point she had put the pants on and was starting to button up the shirt.

"But I doubt that stitching a human could be that much different. Don't worry; I won't let a nasty scar ruin that pretty face. Hmm, at least I think its pretty can't really tell with all that muck on your face." She tried to get a smile from him, but failed.

Sadie walked over to the kitchen sink, grabbed a clean dishtowel and started to wet it with warm water and soap. With a glance over her shoulder, she saw the man staring down at his new clothes in awe. He slowly touched the fabric on his thigh and scrunched his eyebrows together, as if trying to remember something. She turned around holding the damp cloth and just watched him. 'What has happened to him?' She couldn't help but wonder. He seemed to feel her eyes on him, and quickly dropped his hand and stared back at her. He cleared his throat, and Sadie waited for him to speak for the first time since finding him.

"Water," he muttered throatily. Sadie's eyes widened to saucers, feeling like a complete dunce.

"Oh! Of course, I'm so sorry. I should have offered you some immediately," She hastily drew him some water. She handed him the full glass and continued, "It's just not every day I have strange men hiding in my barn, I wasn't thinking."

He chugged the whole glass with her watching, and let her fill it up once more before he seemed sated.

"Thank you." He whispered, while handing it back to her. His voice sounded better now, softer and less raspy. Sadie smiled in reply, and after putting the glass down beside him pushed his hair aside and started softly wiping his face off. He continued to stare at her, but by now it didn't bother her. With each pass of the towel, more of his face was revealed to her. She started to see his under his short beard a defined jaw line, his cheeks were slightly hollowed showing he hadn't eaten lately, but as always his eyes kept drawing her attention. He had spoken so little since she had brought him in, but it felt as if his eyes were pleading with her.

"Don't tell anyone, keep me safe." They seemed to say, and with a nod of her head she answered his voiceless plea.

"To answer your question from before, I don't know you." He looked confused for a moment, as if he had forgotten his first words to her. "But don't worry, you will be safe here. I'm not sure what's happened to you, but it seems like you need a place to lay low. I won't tell anyone you're here. I'll keep you safe."

For the first time she saw him close his eyes and let out a relieved sigh. He almost smiled, but stopped himself, opened his eyes and said, "Thank you, miss."

Sadie nearly laughed at being called miss, but instead asked the one question she had been dying to ask since he landed at her feet.

"What's your name?"

He stared past her now, thinking hard, and it took him a few long moments before finally saying,

"James. I think my name is James."


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to all who have read, commented, added to favorites, and followed. This is my fist time posting anything I have written, and I appreciate all the feedback. I hope to update at least once a week, and since I have most of it already thought out it should be fine. Hope you like this second chapter, not as long as the first but important in its own way.

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Chapter 2

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"James. I think my name is James."

"Ah, well James," She hastily said, "I just have to pop in to the other room to grab some… Things. Should just take a second,"

While scurrying out the door she called over her shoulder, "Ace keep James' company!"

Closing the door quickly behind her, Sadie fell back against it. Her mind running a million miles a minute; things were quickly going from weird to straight crazy. She rubbed at her eyes, feeling just how little sleep she was working on. A man with a metal arm and soul-wrenching eyes was one thing; she could handle that, but to have amnesia too? Her paranoia reared its ugly head. Images of "maybe-James" hovering over her mid-shower, knife-slashing, Psycho style raced across her closed eyes. She shook her head, trying to clear the silly idea. Instead an even creepier idea came to her of him not being James anymore but someone else entirely. She remembered back to his change in demeanor when his arm was exposed, wondering how she could have been so reckless talking to him like that when he had her in such a defenseless position.

"I am so in over my head." She murmured to herself, wondering if she had made a mistake by promising not to tell anyone he was here. Realizing she was taking too long trying to make heads or tails of the situation she went in to her office to find her emergency bag. Doctor Gleason, the veterinarian for pretty much the entire county's farms, sometimes needed her to meet him at a farm with a small triage kit ready and waiting, so she always had the essentials on hand. She snatched up her big bag, turned back to the kitchen, and stopped suddenly.

"It's better to be safe than sorry," she whispered to herself and without thinking too hard about her decision, got the key to the big desk and pulled out her Grandfather's Colt. Frowning, she made sure it was loaded and on safety before placing it as deep as she dared in to the bag while still feeling it was reachable. The gun weighed her bag down, but also her heart. She felt somehow that the strange man would not intentionally harm her. But something was not right with him, that was clear, and she had to look out for herself first. After all, she was all that was left. The kitchen was quiet as she walked back in; James was no longer sitting up on her table but had moved down to one of the chairs. Ace, her lovable if somewhat simple dog, lay near the door with his head down but tail wagging at her return. James had helped himself to an apple, eating straight to the core, not wasting a single bite.

"How are you feeling?" Sadie quietly asked, setting the bag on the table, hoping he couldn't hear the gun clatter about.

"Better." He answered monotone, he rose from his seat swiftly. Grimacing, he said through clenched teeth, "I must go. Tell no one I was here."

"Hey, wait!" Sadie called out as he turned and started to leave. Without pausing or even acknowledging her speaking, he grabbed another apple off the counter and headed for the door. Sadie's arm whipped out, landing on his left shoulder. Through the flannel of the pajama top her fingertips could just make out the seam between real flesh and metal. Before she could get the breath to say anything else she found his body coverings hers as he held her down to the table. Starting with just enough pressure to be uncomfortable, his metal hand began to close down harder on to her exposed throat.

His labored breath was close enough to cause the stray hairs around her face to flutter. Ace ran to the side of the table, barking and lunging forward towards the pair. Watching in wide eyed horror as the man's face came closer and closer to hers, Sadie's right arm flung to the side, reaching frantically for the bag while her left tried in vain to pull his grip off of her. Gasping for air she glanced desperately over to see she was just short of the bags handle. His face was millimeters away from her now, and as her fingernails scraped along the course canvas bag, his head fell heavily in to the crook of her neck. Sadie froze straight down to her soul as his metal hand and then body became limp and covered her from head to foot.

His weight settled on her heavily, causing her to take deep breaths. His forehead, clammy with sweat, seared in to her skin. She could feel his lips moving against her neck, and as she focused she could hear him whispering, "No... Please, no. Kill me." With a heave, she was able to push him off of her and on to his side. Crawling hastily across the table she reached in to the bag, grabbed the gun and swung herself around training the Colt on his face. He wasn't coming after her, instead she saw that his eyes were closed painfully tight, his mouth was still moving but without noise now. Before her eyes his body started contorting and to convulse wildly, Sadie scrambled to bring herself on to his flailing form, keeping him from harming himself too badly. When his head began to knock she reached once again for the bag, bringing the bag's leather handle in to his mouth, keeping him from biting down on his tongue. The attack lasted for a full two minutes, but to Sadie it felt like a lifetime. She couldn't feel the tears falling down her face as she held the man to her and murmured soothingly in to his ear. When he finally calmed, she looked out the window to see the sun just beginning to rise and the last of the rain softly dripping down from the roof. Hoping this was a good omen, that the worst was behind them now, she set about moving James to the living room.

"How did you get heavier?" She asked James unconscious form as she hoisted him up and threw his metal arm over her shoulder. Feeling the arm move under her hands, it felt surreal. The power in his arms was without question, and knowing just how much strength had just been curled around her neck released her from any guilt for pulling him by it. The short walk from the kitchen to the living room took more out of her than anything so far. Her body was starting to shut down from the stress and effort of the night. She finally made it to the couch, giving a final heave to get most of him onto it. Sinking down to the ground next to him, she couldn't help but dose off for a few moments. She went in and out of sleep for about forty seconds before being startled awake by something wet against her cheek.

"Ugh, Ace! I'm up buddy," She said, wiping her cheek of the saliva. Sadie stretched as she stood, looking down on the body half on her large couch. She took inventory in her head of what else needed to be done immediately: stitch his face, wrap his chest, and most importantly get his fever down. With a heavy sigh she went back for the bag and got to work. She spent the early part of the morning cleaning and stitching his deeper cuts. He stayed unconscious for the majority of the time, sometimes mumbling under his breath. The hardest part was wrapping his chest. She had to support his weight while trying not to disturb his injured ribs too much. "Please don't wake up," she repeated in her head as he groaned with pain.

She remained at his side for hours, pressing a cool cloth to his forehead and neck or holding an ice chip to his lips, hoping that along with the ibuprofen she was able to get down him his fever would break. Every hour she checked the thermometer and his temperature never went below 102 degrees. When at noon she realized she had yet to tend to the horses, she felt more than ready to cry. Rising to her feet, she swayed before starting her journey down to the barn. Her boots squelched in the still damp earth, but the sun was shining heavy down upon her. As soon as the door to the barn squeaked open, she could hear the horses nickering in impatience. On any other day they would have been put to pasture hours ago, been brushed, and had a bit of pampering.

"I know, I know. I'm late, sorry guys." She said apologetically, as she let them one by one out of their pens. As the last one trotted out to their field, she clicked the gate closed and leaned against it. The past 12 hours felt like a lifetime, and all she wanted was to sleep. The horses on the other hand were full of energy, having been cooped up so long. Violet and Cowboy were racing along the fence, neck and neck until Violet reached over to nip Cowboy, which caused a round of horseplay to start. Sadie laughed for the first time in hours, but her smile fell instantly as she looked back at the house.

For the first time in years she prayed, "Please God, am I doing the right thing? He needs help, but am I the right one to give it to him? I don't know if I'm strong enough… Please give me strength. Please help me."

With no divine answer coming down to her from the heavens she gave one last longing look to the frolicking horses before trudging back to the house. She checked quickly on James, and seeing no change took a moment for her own needs. After a small bite to eat, change of clothes, and brushed teeth she felt a little more human and capable of what she needed to do. Once back in the living room she checked the time and realized it was due for her to check his temperature. With none of the hope she had had in the past hours she waited for the beep to signal it was done. Looking down at the screen she smiled as she saw:

100.8 ˚ F

"Where am I?" She heard whispering below her. Looking down, her smile grew as she saw his eyes open and none of the malice from the night before could be seen in them. In that moment she could believe that his anger and actions from the night before had all been due to his fever.

"We're at Dugan Ranch. You need your rest, sleep." She cooed to him, and after a brief moment of confusion his head fell back once more. Relieved that he seemed to be out of the woods; Sadie sank down to the floor and immediately fell asleep with her head resting on James shoulder.

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Hoped you liked it! The next chapter might be from James point of view, so get excited!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

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He was falling in a world of white and grey. Hurtling towards his imminent death he wondered, 'Shouldn't I be scared?' But he wasn't, instead a calm stillness came over his body allowing him to take in his surroundings with utmost clarity. The grey mass around him sharpened slowly in to stone, tall mountains of stone covered in white snow. The harder he tried the more he could focus, until saw straight down to the cracks and pores of the stone. It was then he realized something quite odd, he was falling upwards. He looked behind him to see the ground rushing away from him, becoming a single blurry line in between two mountains. Looking above there was a train, and a man hanging on to its side. For some reason he knew he had to get to the man, to help him; but he had no idea why, or who he could be. No matter how far he fell up, it seemed he could never quite reach the train or make out the face of the unknown man. He could hear screaming, a bone-chilling howl of death. He looked away from the man on the train to find the source, only to realize it was himself. As his screams echoed in the crevasse of the mountain gravity cruelly turned back on hurtling him back down. Apparently, falling down was much faster than falling up as he was suddenly feet away from the ground. 'No,' he thought as he braced himself for impact, 'I can't die. He needs me, he's always needed me.'

James' eyes shot open. He was no longer in the mountains, no longer falling. 'Only a dream,' he thought, but he couldn't remember ever having a dream before, somehow he just knew it was one. It was hard for him to get his bearings; he wasn't used to waking up from a natural sleep. There was no electric shock to start his heart, or unbearable heat to wake his frozen body. He felt sluggish without the physical pains to kick start him. But slowly he became fully aware of his surroundings. Though sparsely decorated, he could see he was in someone's family room. The furniture was old, probably passed down, except for the couch he was currently laying on which was huge and extremely modern. His chest felt as if it had been run over, the car put in reverse and run over again. But it was nothing he couldn't deal with; after all he had been through much worse. He heard a soft thumping to his left, glancing over he came nose to snout with a large mutt. There was no telling what type of dog it was, a true Heinz 57, but the joy in its eyes at seeing James awake spoke volumes about its temperament.

James had learned long ago to trust his instincts, and for once nothing seemed amiss. That is until he heard a soft soprano voice singing in the room next to him. His body froze as he tried to recall exactly what happened the night before. He could vaguely remember traveling out from the forest, through acres of pastures before stumbling across a barn. He had decided to stop for the first time since his escape. Upon finding an empty stall, he collapsed and that's where things get blurry. He couldn't say how he got in to the house or into a change of clothes, but flexing his metal hand he could recall a small fight, more of a struggle between himself and someone else. He wondered if it could be the woman. 'She must be dangerous.' He concluded, he wouldn't harm someone unless they were a threat.

"Oh, you're up!" His head whipped around, missing what she said next as he took the woman in. She was obviously not a threat, he thought with his first glance. First, her build was all wrong for fighting; she was tiny, no taller than two inches over five feet, and her muscles, though toned, were not terribly strong. Her oval face showed genuine concern, unlike the handlers and scientists he was used to. With her auburn hair pulled back, he could see just how blue her almond shaped eyes were. He couldn't help but stare as she was beautiful, and he hadn't noticed anything like that ever since he could remember.

"James?" She asked worriedly, "Are you feeling alright?"

He realized she must have asked him a question before when he had zoned out. James eyes fell to the side, ashamed that he was being so weak around her. He knew better than to trust anyone, she had to be just like all the others. He tried sitting up, hissing as the pain in chest intensified. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the woman start to walk towards him. 'To help or to push me back down,' he wondered. He held a hand up to stop her approach. She halted immediately, an almost scared look in her eyes. It's good for her to be scared, he thought. He flung his legs off of the couch, resting them on the floor before catching his breath and finally speaking.

"I'm fine." His words came out monotone, "Who have you told?"

"No one!" she replied immediately, hurt that he would ask such a thing.

"Humph." He didn't believe her. Glancing out the window, he could see it was just daybreak. "Where am I?"

"You probably don't remember much from last night," she started inching closer to him as she spoke, keeping her hands up in a sign of peace, "but I found you in my barn and brought you home."

It irritated him that she didn't answer his question. But he let her continue, knowing that even in his weakened state he could end her if he needed to.

"You've been in and out of it for the past twenty-four hours. I promised you that I wouldn't tell anyone you've been here, and I haven't." She was next to him now, reaching down for his hands. He noticed immediately that she didn't shy away from his metal arm, as most do.

"You're at Dugan Farm, in Virginia." she continued in a calm voice, "I'm Sadie Dugan, and if you'd like I have breakfast in the kitchen?"

It bothered him that she spoke to him like a child, but the idea of food allowed him to overlook it this time. He looked back down at her outstretched hands; they were a contradiction in textures. They looked comforting and soft while at the same time rough and hard working. He desperately wanted to take hold of her hands, to have someone to ground him. He started to reach with his normal hand for hers when he remembered something that seemed peculiar. His eyes flew to hers, pinning her in place accusingly.

"Why do you call me that?" He asked, recoiling from her touch. She pulled her own hands back, confused by his change in demeanor.

"What, James?" Sadie barely kept up with his change in direction, "last night you told me you thought that was your name. Is it?"

Was it his name? He couldn't be sure he even had a name, he was only known as Soldier to his handlers and Winter Soldier to those he allowed to live. But the Captain had called him James, had said he knew him. The Soldier winced as another name drifted through his subconscious.

'No, he had called me Bucky.' He thought disdainfully, as if he would ever go by such an idiotic name. But something about that name made his heart race and caused a throbbing to start behind his eyes. He didn't like how he felt when he thought of that name, but James didn't hurt so badly.

"It is." He said deciding James was as good a name as any. James began to lift himself up from the couch when the pair heard a firm knocking on the front door.

Bam-bam-bam!

Sadie and James froze; her eyes wide with surprise and fear as she glanced back and forth from James to where the door was down the hall. James recovered from his surprise much quicker, abruptly standing to full height he grabbed Sadie by the arm and whipped her around so that her back was to him. His metal arm held her securely down with her arms trapped around her middle while his other hand tilted her head up to him. It was an awkward angle, meant to scare her; she knew he could kill her in a blink of an eye.

"Who is that?" He growled in to her ear.

"I don't know," She whispered back quickly, "Please let me go, trust me."

His grip didn't lessen. The banging on the door continued and Ace had by this point run to the door, barking at the intruder. James programming was telling him to end the girl and run, but just like when he pulled the Captain out from the water he couldn't kill her. Could he trust her? He didn't know for sure, but he did know she wasn't a threat. He slowly released her, and as soon as she felt she could escape from him she bolted to the other side of the room.

"Stay in the kitchen," she said while moving her sore neck side to side, "and don't come out, okay?"

She didn't wait for an answer but moved in to the hallway towards the front door. He did as he was told, claiming a spot against the kitchen counter. Through the walls of the old house he could still hear her as she opened the creaking door.

"Oh, hello Officer," He hear her say cheerfully.

"Hello ma'am."

'Great cops,' he thought, grabbing for the butcher knife behind him. He waited to act, listening for what would happen next.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear you knocking I was down at the barn when I heard Ace here," scratching the dog on the head, "Can I help you with something?" She said next, and James heard slight rustling as the police officer pulled out a piece of paper, unfolded it and showed it to her. Sadie knew instantly it was a picture of James, even though in the picture he was healthy and outfitted in some sort of black armor. He looked terrifying, she thought.

"Ma'am we're looking for this man, do you have any information on his whereabouts?" the officer asked, Sadie looked down at his name plate, Officer Drum.

"Hmm," She murmured as she took the proffered paper. Taking a moment to look it over, she almost wanted to say, "Actually yes, he's in my kitchen right now." But instead she handed the paper back.

"You know what?" She asked, causing the officer to perk up and James to start moving towards the hallway, "The other night I was riding along the fence in my upper west pasture when I saw something move out in the woods."

James stopped just short of the door, what was she doing?

"I didn't get a good look at it; at the time I thought it was a bear. But maybe it was him?" She continued, "Anyway, the thing went barreling off in to the woods due west."

The police officer wrote something down in his notebook before asking, "And what night was this?"

"Let me see," She hesitated, "Must have been last Saturday. Should I be worried?"

Sadie saw Officer Drum's eyes become dull, losing all the excitement he had just had.

"Don't worry ma'am, that couldn't have been him. He just escaped custody this past Monday." Officer Drum flipped his notebook shut, tilted his head to Sadie and said, "Thank you for your time."

"Oh! Thank goodness," she fluttered a hand to her heart, "I was so worried there for a minute. Thank you for coming by, I'll make sure to call if I see anything."

Sadie watched from the porch as the officer got in to his cruiser, with a smile for the officer she waved as he turned left out of her driveway presumably to go to the next farm over. As the dirt settled on Sadie's driveway her fake smile transformed in to a sneer..

James returned the butcher knife to the block when he heard her say goodbye and sat down at the kitchen table, waiting for her return. The front door slammed shut, and Sadie stormed in to the kitchen. James saw a completely different woman from the one he had met this morning. She was livid, eyes storming she strode forward to right in between his legs before pointing a finger straight at his nose.

"That is it!" She jabbed her finger in to his shoulder, she winced in pain as she hit metal, "Ever since I found you all I have done is try to help, and how do you repay me? Choking me and trying to break my neck!"

James eyes shot to her neck, he could just see the beginnings of a bruise in the shape of his hand. He started to speak but before he could she spun and begun pacing in front of him. If she had been looking she could have seen his eyes cloud over with guilt. He had never known kindness before, she was right he had done nothing to deserve it.

"You need to go tonight when it gets dark." She stopped pacing, instead heading towards the door. Once the door was opened, she said without turning back, "Get cleaned up, take a shower, eat some food, whatever; take whatever clothes fit you in the upstairs bedroom on the left. I just never want to see you again."

She strode out the door without a second glance. James sat stunned, his mind unable to keep up with how he was feeling by what had just happened. He looked down to Ace, reached out a hand to pet him but Ace bounded off after Sadie through the doggie-door. He was alone, like always.

* * *

Aw poor Bucky... Hope it was worth the wait! Please review and let me know what you think?


	4. Chapter 4

**This was a hard chapter for me to write, I must have re-done it about five times. I hope y'all like it, please let me know what your think. Please forgive any grammatical or spelling mistakes, I'm actually looking for a Beta Reader right now. If your interested PM me?**

* * *

Chapter 4

* * *

The flap from the dog door echoed in the kitchen, emphasizing just how alone James was. His eyes fluttered around the spacious room taking in the generous breakfast Sadie had made for them, and then focusing on the door she had slammed shut behind her. But his mind couldn't process any of it. He could feel everything: guilt, anger, sadness, fear, and many other unknown feelings that swirled about in his head. His breath shortened, coming in wheezing gasps.

His eyes slammed shut, for a moment he wished had never run. Before he left there was nothing to feel at least. He could count on someone always watching him, telling him what to do, pulling the strings for him. In a way it's comforting, being able to let someone else control your life for you. As if one could call it a life. Before his last mission, he never thought he had ever lived a normal life. He could easily kill and follow orders because that's what he was made for, nothing else. He didn't know if he could even be anything else.

He opened his eyes once more, and immediately regretted it. Everything in the house screamed of Sadie. His heart sank ever further with each new reminder he came across. This was especially true when he remembered the look in her eyes when she had left. It reminded him too much of his encounter with his last target. That single look said he had failed them in some way, but he couldn't begin to explain why. James slammed his fist on the table, leaving a dent. His breathing began to slow, the adrenaline started to leave his system allowing the ache in his ribs to return tenfold.

With a slight grunt he stood. There was no use dwelling on what had happened with the girl, no matter what she caused him to feel. He decided to do as she said: eat and get cleaned up. The breakfast's aroma caused his stomach to grumble with hunger. Picking up the wooden spoon she had used to make the eggs he scooped more than a mouthful up and into his mouth. Chewing without grace or decorum he grabbed two slices of bacon to go with the eggs. The food had cooled since Sadie had first invited him to breakfast, but to James the meal was perfection. Thirsty, he drank straight from the tap. Glancing back at the stove he realized he had finished off the entire meal by himself, causing another strange feeling to go through him. 'No food left for her,' his subconscious murmured. James tried to shrug it off, trudging up the stairs.

The stairs led to a hallway with four doors, two of them closed off. The open door straight across from the landing led to the bathroom, where he went in and started up the shower. He removed his clothes carefully, grateful for the button down shirt. Once again he wondered how she managed to get him in to the soft pajamas, but shook his head to keep away the thought. He unwound the bandage around his ribs, hissing slightly with the movement. Looking down he saw his skin was yellow and blue all over, hardly a piece of him was untouched. He turned to the mirror in order to get a better look. His face caught his attention instead. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen his own face in a true mirror, just passing glances in the reflections off of buildings or his own arm. His hair seemed too long to him and the short beard he had annoyed him.

But what caught his attention most were the neat stitches that ran along his left eyebrow and up his forehead. The site was still tender as he lightly touched the raised thread, but the stitches were perfect. 'Who is this girl?' he wondered in awe. Hearing something outside the window he peeked through the curtains to see her walking to a parked truck while talking on her cell. She let Ace jump in to the passenger seat before getting in and driving off down the dirt driveway.

"Where are you going?" He asked aloud as he got in to the shower, giving up on not thinking about her.

Though her chest had ached from the effort, Sadie refused to cry. She didn't look back at the house as she marched down to the barn with Ace in tow. She scratched the clueless mutt behind the ears, wishing her life could be as simple as his.

"You have no idea what's going on do you?" She asked him ruefully. Ace looked up at her and tilted his head to the side mid-stride, trying with all his might to figure out what she was saying to him, causing Sadie to bark out a laugh in spite of the situation.

"Come on, Silly. We've got work to do," Sadie pulled open the barn door, for once looking forward to her mid-morning chores; anything to get her mind off the brooding, handsome maniac in her home. The horses had already been put to pasture early that morning, seemingly forgiving her of neglecting them the morning before. But because of all the commotion none of the other chores had been done, meaning extra mucking. Used to be, when Sadie's Grandfather was alive, that they would work together and sometimes a hired hand to do all the not-so-glamorous work. Now it was just her and Ace, and he wasn't much help.

Sadie spent the good part of an hour cleaning out the stalls and putting fresh hay down. Hearing her stomach growl, she realized she never ate any of that great breakfast she had made. Just thinking about the bacon and eggs made her groan out loud. She started to walk back up to the house to get some of it, before chickening out. She didn't want to bump in to James, no telling what might happen with him. Though the track record pointed to her being tossed around like a rag doll, and she was not letting that happen again. With a huff, Sadie plopped down on a bale of hay outside the barn. Literally twiddling her thumbs she wondered what she should do until sundown. She started to lean back against the wall when her phone rang in her back pocket, startled, her head smacked against the wall.

"Ow ow ow," she muttered as she dug out her phone, seeing the name on the screen she answered the call, "Hello?"

"Hi Sadie," she heard the warm voice of Miranda, wife of Doctor Henry Gleason, come over the phone, "How are you sweetie?"

Sadie rolled her eyes, 'where to begin?'

"I'm good," she lied, "what can I do for you?"

"Well I'm sorry to call. I know your taking time to handle things at home, but Doctor Gleason was wondering if you might have time to help him with a house call?" Sadie never could figure out why Miranda insisted on calling her husband "Doctor Gleason" whenever she spoke about him.

"Yes, I'd love to!" Sadie replied quickly, excited to have an excuse to leave the farm. "Do I need to bring anything?"

"No don't worry about that, Honey, it's just a simple vaccine appointment for Gary's lambs. So could you meet him there in about an hour?"

"Sure thing," Sadie said heading to her truck, "I'll actually head out now, maybe get there a little early."

She ended the call quickly, knowing Miranda she would start in on how Sadie worked too much or worse invite her to live with them again. Sadie knew that her intentions were good, of course, but there was no way she could handle being around Miranda Gleason twenty-four-seven. That woman could talk your ear off. The drive to Gary Newman's ranch took about twenty minutes, giving Sadie enough time to stop in town and get a hamburger and fries for her and Ace. The morning had been busy enough to keep James from her mind too much, but nothing on the open road could distract her from her thoughts.

"You did the right thing sending him away," she told herself. But chewing on her bottom lip she doubted her own statement. She knew nothing about him; maybe he was just scared and alone. But on the other hand, she knew nothing about him, maybe he's just psycho. Sadie pulled down the visor and flipped up the mirror, raising her head up she looked at her neck. There were five small bruises where his fingertips had been around her throat, but besides that she felt fine. Slamming the visor back up, she stroked her neck, feeling the slight tenderness. She remembered how he had felt when pushed up against her: all muscle, tension, and just enough pressure- She cut off that train of thought as a shiver went down her spine.

Pulling down the drive way of Newman Ranch she saw Henry's old truck already parked in front of the pasture gate. Pulling in next to his truck Sadie let Ace out of the truck first; he shot across the yard to where Henry was speaking with Gary. Sadie saw the grey-haired Dr. Gleason get down on both knees to hug the jumping Ace. Ace had come to Henry's office when he was less than two weeks old after being found nearly dead by the river, so the two went way back.

"Okay," Sadie mumbled her pep talk as she walked over to the trio, "Act normal, act normal, act normal."

"Hey Doc, Gary, how are you?" She asked with a forced smile. The three exchanged pleasantries for a few minutes before Henry and Sadie started down to the enclosure where the lambs were. The two didn't speak as they walked, a familiarity brought on by years and years of knowing each other.

"Ace, stay." Sadie commanded as they went through the gate, leaving Ace to chase flies. The lambs were now ready for their three month booster shots, Sadie could remember helping with almost each of the births. They had six lambs to inoculate, taking about thirty minutes for each one to do an initial check up and then the shot. As they worked, Sadie noticed the Doc watching her every now and then. By the end Sadie was beat, but happy that she had been able to help.

"Well, that's the last of them," Sadie said, wiping her hands on her jeans. Henry nodded with a small smile and then opened the gate for Sadie. The two started back towards the trucks, with Ace in tow.

"So, do you want to talk about it?" Doctor Gleason asked softly when they reached the trucks. He hoisted his gear into the truck bed then turned and waited for Sadie to respond. She should have known he would pick up that something was wrong. The man said little, but saw everything. The tears she had kept down earlier pricked once more behind her eyes. Looking up at her mentor, really more of a second grandfather, she couldn't hold the tears back any longer. As she broke down, he enveloped her in a strong hug letting her cry without any questions. Her cries continued for a few minutes, as her mind worked its way through each of the stress filled moments from the past two days: the dread of waking in the middle of the night, finding him, trying to save his life, the fear that he would die, and finally the fear of him. When she quieted, she desperately wanted to tell him everything, but she had promised James and she wouldn't go back on that even to Henry.

"Thank you," She sniffled and wiped at her eyes, "It's just been a rough couple of days at the farm."

He knew that was just skimming the surface of what was troubling her, but simply nodded and let it be at that. He was never one to pry, and knowing Sadie he knew she would talk about it when she could. At first when he had seen her come out of her truck he thought she was having a hard time still with her Grandfathers death, but the longer he was around her he could see it was something much more than that.

"Okay," He said as he patted her on the shoulder, "I know you'll be okay, Sadie. You're such a strong girl, your Grandfather would be so proud."

Sadie smiled through watery eyes before giving him one last hug goodbye. The sun was just about to set as she drove back to the farm. She wondered if he would still be there when she got back. As she drove down her driveway she could see no lights on except the one in the kitchen. Turning off the engine she left the keys in and just rested her head on the steering wheel. Ace watched her curiously, wondering why she wasn't letting him out. Eventually she raised her head, opened the truck door, and walked to the back door. Walking through the mud room she got a sense of déjà vu from the other night. She had just walked in to the kitchen when she saw. He was still there, right where she left him, sitting at her kitchen table.

For a split second she thought maybe he hadn't moved all day, but then she noticed his clean appearance and new clothes. In a button down, long sleeved shirt and jeans he almost looked like a normal guy waiting on his girl to come home. She stayed in the doorway staring at him, staring at her. Ace weaved around her legs and ran up to him just as he did with Henry. Sadie realized she had been holding her breath when James broke eye contact to pet Ace. She felt as if she could move again, that is until she saw the metallic hand come up to stroke her dog's head.

"What are you doing here?" She couldn't speak louder than a whisper, her throat tight with emotion. James once again pinned her in place with his stare, causing her heart to beat so hard it felt like it was coming out of her chest.

"I'm sorry," He said slowly. The two words came out almost in a question, as if he wasn't comfortable saying the words. "For how I acted, I'm sorry."

Silence hung in the air, neither moving nor knowing what to do now, they continued to lock eyes. His eyes always seemed to tell her exactly how his mental state was; when he was manic she saw it first in his eyes. But now his eyes held a similar look as when she first found him: scared and confused… Vulnerable.

"Let me stay?" He finally asked, before hastily adding, "Please."

After what felt like an eternity to him she whispered back, "Okay."


	5. Chapter 5

_"Let me stay?" He finally asked, before hastily adding, "Please."_

_ After what felt like an eternity to him she whispered back, "Okay."_

Silence fell once more over the pair. Where did they go from here? James decided to act first, feeling the need to still make up for his actions from the past two days. He stood swiftly, causing the chair to scrape back against the floor. Sadie gasped, startled, but didn't run. James held out the chair and with a sweep of his arm offered it for her to sit in. Sadie wearily looked from the chair up to James. None of the maliciously confident man from before could be seen in him now, instead only a man who seemed more scared of her than she was of him. She saw a light blush creep over his cheeks before his eyes fell to the side. With measured steps she came up to the chair until it was the only thing between the two of them, and then as he had done motioned for him to take the chair opposite her. James eyebrows rose. So, she had some sense of self-preservation after all. Rule number one: don't turn your back on a perceived threat. James walked around to the other side of the table, when he reached his chair they sat down in tandem.

Sadie couldn't hold in her question any longer once they were seated.

"Why?"

James couldn't be sure what she was asking. Why did he try to hurt her? Why was he being hunted? So many why's he might or might not be able to answer. So with a slight squint of his eyes and a tilt to his head he waited for her to elaborate.

With a huff she elaborated, "Why do you want to stay here?"

James didn't answer immediately, and the longer he took the more uncomfortable Sadie felt, she hated awkward silences. But she held firm, knowing eventually he would have to answer. As he thought about his answer James entire body seemed to sink in on itself, the arm resting on the table became the only thing holding his head up. His hunched back shook.

'Was he crying?' Just like before Sadie felt the overwhelming need to help him. She reached across the table and touched his arm. His head shot up at the contact, eyes wide. No tears fell from his eyes, but his face showed such anguish. It was as if he couldn't cry even if he wanted to.

"Why are you helping me?" He asked her in disbelief. They remained connected through the soft contact of hand on arm. Sadie grinned before saying, "I asked you first."

"Heh," he gave a short, humorless laugh, before telling a half-truth, "I want to stay because I don't know where to go. I don't even know how or why I came here."

Earlier in the day, he had nothing do to but wait for the sun to set after he had cleaned himself off and gotten a change of clothes. He had waited in the kitchen, right where she found him when she got home. As he waited he tried desperately to plan what he was to do next, but nothing came to him. He realized he knew nothing about the world, let alone himself and without someone telling him what his mission was he felt stuck. Something inside him had led him to her farm, he had finally decided, he needed to be here.

"What happened to you?" Sadie felt she could finally ask, but James just shook his head and pointed to her.

"Oh, my turn?" She asked playfully, "Well, fair's fair, I guess. I'm helping you because…"

She paused, not really sure how to answer. Feeling that she still had her hand on him she pulled it back quickly, "I… I don't really know why. I guess I just have to. Is that weird?"

Without thinking he deadpanned, "Kind of," causing Sadie to burst out laughing.

His sarcastic remark surprised her, popping the balloon of tension she had been holding inside her, causing her to laugh even harder until tears formed in her eye. James drank in her happiness, not remembering ever being the cause before. She finally got enough sense to open her eyes enough to look back at James, seeing how intently he was watching her she took a couple deep, gulping breaths to get herself together. She wiped the moisture from her eyes before smiling again.

"How about a tour, then we can get down to the hard questions?" She asked standing and stretching her arms overhead.

"Sounds good."

* * *

Dr. Calixta Sharpe's heels clicked down the bunker hallway leading to the science department. The hall wasn't crowded, but those she passed quickly moved out of her way and avoided looking her in the eyes. As she reached the double doors to the conference room she could hear the low murmuring of many people talking at once. With a flourish she opened the door and let it slam shut behind her. Every set of eyes turned to her as a hush fell over the room. She was the last to arrive, just as she had planned. With all attention fixed on her, Calixta sashayed over to the chair at the head of the table and stood next to it. She took a moment to give passing glance to each one of the men and women around the long table, twenty-four in all. An unnatural stillness came over each person as her eyes passed over them, dreading the possibility that she would call them out.

Calixta Sharpe was not what one could call naturally intimidating in appearance. Actually, most people's first impression was that she had to be the eye-candy secretary for some well-to-do high up, definitely not the head of scientific research for Hydra. No one knew the full story of how she was raised through the ranks so quickly, especially for one so young, only twenty-eight. Some said that she was the intern who worked with Bruce Banner and had stolen some of his work, thus ensuring her spot. Others said she slept her way to the top, but for some reason those people were soon never heard from again. Calixta heaved a heavy sigh, massaging the temple of her forehead and giving a coquettish look to the assembly.

"Where is my Soldier?" She broke the silence, her Estuary English accent coming out more than usual as she asked in a hurt tone. Calixta watched the heads of her colleagues swivel as they waited for someone to speak. Impatient, Calixta asked in a sickly-sweet tone, "Well?"

A shaking hand slowly rose in to the air, about halfway down the table. Calixta couldn't quite make out the face, the man being very short his face was hidden behind the woman sitting beside him. That is until the poor woman scooted back, mostly to get out of the direct line of sight of Dr. Sharpe.

"Ah, yes Mr. Harding, do you have any information?" Calixta spoke. Paul Harding lowered his hand and stood, amazed that she knew his name; after all they had met just once many months ago.

"Well, ahem" He cleared his throat, "we were able to track him to the border of Virginia. But then we lost him."

Calixta gave a forced smile, more of a grimace before asking what to her was the obvious.

"We did put tracking devices in him, did we not? How did we lose him?"

Harding's eyes batted wildly from one colleagues to the next, hoping someone would help him out. When no one did he continued,

"He seems to have disabled them all," Harding's voice fell down to almost a whisper, "even the one in his arm."

Like a flip of a light Dr. Sharpe's demeanor switched,

"Really?" She asked excitedly, "Oh, I knew he was a smart one, but that's impressive."

"We are working on finding him," another voice added, Calixta looked out to see Trevor Cole speaking, "We've got eyes on every camera, computer, and satellite. We've also got men on the ground searching for him as well. He couldn't have gotten far."

Calixta closed her eyes, tried to take calming breaths, but failed. Her hands shot down to the table with a slam.

"You don't get to speak Cole," She hissed, "I know you're the one who wiped him. It's your fault we're here in the first place."

Cole refused to look abashed; instead he stood from his chair and said, "I was following the orders of Mr. Pierce. Anyone would have done the same in my position."

Calixta rolled her eyes.

"No, actually most people would have contacted me first," she couldn't control her anger anymore and yelled, "Because he's _my_ project!"

Calixta began to pace in front of the long table with all eyes on her.

"I should have destroyed that bloody machine from the start." She murmured to herself, then turned back to Cole, "Do you have any idea what you've done!?"

"That machine is meant to restart the brain," she explained sweetly, speaking in tones suited for a infant, "That means when you wiped him this last time, you wiped _all of my work too."_

Calixta's eyes shifted, "Mr. Harding, you're a smart man. Tell Cole what that means, please."

Harding fidgeted, feeling like a schoolboy who forgot his homework.

"That means we don't know what his mental state is now." He answered.

"Precisely! A-plus Mr. Harding." Harding smiled at the praise before seeing the death glare he was receiving from the muscular Cole. Calixta stopped pacing, took two more calming breaths before finally sitting down in her chair. Steeple-ing her hands before her mouth she said as calmly as she could manage, "I want Cole and his team to leave. Now," About half the table stood and headed towards the door.

"Oh, and Cole," She stopped him as he reached the door, "You better find him, or the next person to be wiped will be you. Just imagine how much better I could make you…Do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am," he replied begrudgingly before turning to leave. As the door closed behind him he could hear Calixta start on to the next point of the meeting.

"So, where are we on Project 935?"

* * *

"And this is Cowboy," Sadie led the last of the horses in to the barn for the night, letting the horse sniff James as she had with all the others. Sadie had already shown James the rest of the house, leaving the barn and the horses to be the last part of the tour. For some reason this horse caught his eye more than any of the others. Cowboy was tan all over, Buckskin, with the darkest brown hair falling in to his eyes. Feeling almost a kinship to the animal James started putting his hand out to pet Cowboy on the nose. But before he could touch the horse Sadie quickly pulled on Cowboy's bridle, turning the horses head and led him to his stall.

"Sorry," she said, before shutting the stall behind her, "Cowboy is a bit of a rascal at the best of times, just didn't want him to give you a bite."

"Do you ride?" She asked on their way back to the house.

"I don't think so," he replied.

"Oh." The two continued the rest of the way in silence. Sadie noticed a chill in the night air, the beginning of fall. She opened the back door and let James walk in first.

"You don't seem to know a lot about yourself." Sadie stated once they were in the kitchen. She started fiddling with the teapot, putting water on to boil. Once the stove was lit, she turned back to James.

"Is it amnesia?" She asked hesitantly. James bounced slightly from foot to foot, suddenly nervous again. His training said not to tell her anything, but he felt with his entire being that he could trust her with this.

"I'm not sure what it is." He started, walking back to the table before continuing. "You will probably want me to leave again when I tell you. I don't really know anything, who I am, what year it is, why I had to do it. I was woken up about a month ago, I think, nothing really makes sense."

"What do you mean, woken up? Were you in a coma?" Sadie hated to interrupt, especially since this was the most she'd ever heard him speak.

"In a sense," he answered, "I was in cryo."

"You were frozen. Wow, okay go on." Any other person, any other day, she would have laughed at the idea of someone turning up on her doorstep claiming to have been cryogenically frozen.

James steeled himself for whatever her reaction might be to what he had to say next.

"My mission was to kill Captain America," James could see the whites of Sadie's eyes as they widened with each word spoken. Sadie sat stunned, eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly open. A soft, high-pitched whistling began but she didn't move. Only when the whistling was almost deafening did her haze wear off. James watched as she stood abruptly and went to the stove in a trance. She killed the light of the burner, grabbed two mugs from the cabinet, opened up two packages, poured them in the mugs, and finished by pouring the hot water over it before heading back to the table. She set down one mug in front of James, the smell wafted up to his nose bringing a sensation of comfort; ah, hot chocolate. Sadie sat once more, and brought her mug up to her lips.

"Shit, that's hot!" She yelped, abruptly bringing the mug back to the table. Catching her outburst she said to James sheepishly, "Sorry."

The burn to her tongue brought her out of her surprised state, restarting her mind to focus on what he had said to her and not how fantastical the whole situation was.

"O-kay," she drew the word out, "So you had to kill Steve Rogers…But he's still alive, so what happened?"

Before he could answer a thought came to her, "Oh my gosh, were you being controlled? Like brainwashed?"

"Wait, wait, wait," she interrupted again, "you're not still trying to kill him right?"

"No, I'm not going to kill him. They did something to my mind, but I feel like I was like this long before this mission. Either way, I didn't do what they wanted."

"Why?" she asked quietly.

"He said he knew me, said I was his friend." James head fell once more, "How? I've never been out before. I've never had a friend."

"So you didn't recognize him?" She asked.

A ghost of a memory whispered through his mind, just three words, "I knew him." But he didn't know him, nothing about him was familiar! Frustrated, James raked his metallic hand through his hair.

"No. Maybe?" He looked into Sadie's eyes, "but he called me a name that made me feel something. Ugh, I don't know why I'm telling you this."

"What name?" She prodded gently. The name sat on the tip of his tongue, waiting to be released. He stubbornly kept his mouth shut, scrunching his eyes closed, feeling all the emotion that came along with _that blasted_ name. He felt her hand come across and take hold of his own, his metal hand. His eyes opened once more to look upon her. She gave a slight squeeze and a small smile before nodding her head in encouragement.

"James, what did he call you?"

"Bucky," He breathed, then in a more controlled voice, "James Buchanan Barnes."

Sadie nearly passed out by letting the air out of her lungs in one fell gasp of air. She pulled her hand away, putting both over her mouth. Her eyes welled with tears, hanging on to her eyelids as she kept them open wide. James had thought her reaction to his mission was bad, but this was painful. 'What was it about that name?' He knew he shouldn't have told her. Stumbling out of his chair, he started towards the door. 'She won't want me here now, damn it, but why?'

"Wait!" She yelled after him, "I _do _know you."

* * *

**So she knows who he is now, and you go to meet Dr. Sharpe. What'd you think?**


	6. Chapter 6

Hi all! Please forgive me for taking so long to continue this story, I can't believe it's been over a month. For a multitude of reasons I have decided to rewrite this story. The rewritten versions first chapter has just been put up under the story name Winters Haven. I hope you will give the rewrite a try; it's fairly different from Winters Thaw in that it is written in first person and I've changed a bit of the beginning. Thanks for sticking with me, and please let me know how the rewrite compares to the original.

Ariel June


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